beautiful.

so my homesick-ness has reached an all time high. Jojo shared this with me. Her name is Yael Naim. She sings in Hebrew and French. She is the singer from the Mac Air advertisement. This song is called Far Far. Jo said that it reminded her of us. I started to tear up over the phone because it really pulled some heart strings. and it feels good to know i am never without her.

** here are the lyrics

far far, there's this little girl
she was praying for something to happen to her
everyday she writes words and more words
just to speak out the thoughts that keep floating inside
and she's strong when the dreams come cos' they
take her, cover her, they are all over
the reality looks far now, but don't go

how can you stay outside?
there's a beautiful mess inside
how can you stay outside?
there's a beautiful mess inside
oh oh oh oh

far far, there's this little girl
she was praying for something good to happen to her
from time to time there're colors and shapes
dazeling her eyes, tickeling her hands
they invent her a new world with
oil skies and aquarel rivers
but don't you run away already
please don't go oh oh

how can you stay outside?
there's a beautiful mess inside
how an you stay outside?
there's a beautiful mess inside
take a deep breath and dive
there's a beautiful mess inside
how can you stay outside?
There's a beautiful mess
beautiful mess inside

oh beautiful, beautiful

far far there's this little girl
she was praying for something big to happen to her
every night she ears beautiful strange music
it's everywhere there's nowhere to hide
but if it fades she begs
"oh lord don't take it from me, don't take it yourselves"

i guess i'll have to give it birth
to give it birth
i guess, i guess, i guess i have to give it birth
i guess i have to, have to give it birth
there's a beautiful mess inside and it's everywhere

so shake it yourself now deep inside
deeper than you ever dared
deeper than you ever dared
there's a beautiful mess inside
beautiful mess inside

hustle**

I love how someone who can inspire has the creative spiritual power to demand someones attention, can keep a room quiet with open ears and concerned eyes.there is so much shouting now a days. so many people demanding your attention...screaming look at me! look at me! I wanna be inspired...not screamed at. there is something about todays world that i have grown tired of.Specifically my generation. We think we can put on a set of clothes and wear a certain hat and like a certain thing. and all of a sudden we are a certain way. Am I being too general?
let me be more specific. A big reason why I have left california..is this exact reason. who are our new heros? Kate Moss and Lindsay Lohan? A lot of folks my age think that if you quote De La Soul, and throw on some stunners and an adidas track jacket accompanied by a bedouin head scarf around your neck. you're all good. you're hip hop. your cool. just like Lauren said, people put dreads in your hair and they forget the pain and struggle and metaphor that dreadlocks represent. I think its totally fine and beautiful to embrace another's culture but let's be real here. sometimes it just looks down right empty and superficial. The bedouin scarf for example...there are thousands of Iraqis and Palestinians in the warpath with the same scarves on them. and we wear them as a fashion statement. I just want to be inspired by good people that are r e a l. and responsible. socially responsible.
i don't want to know people who are chasing money...chasin the limelight. chasin the image. whatver happened to real SOUL.been round too many of those folks chasin the superficial. Now that I am out here in the East I am looking for truefriendship. so i am forcing my self to be more selective. I want to open my mind more and I believe if i ask the universe for this...it will be granted.
above is an ani difranco piece that i play to myself whenever i feel alone or feel uninspired. there is such a sense of urgency in her face and in her voice that resonates with authenticity. It seeps out her pores.
I wanna be round folks like that. people with a sense of urgency for whats real and whats good and really needs to be talked about.


**okay i'll stop now. just gotta get that off my chest.

oh yeah!

i am going to start a log of all the fabulous things lucas has said in his sleep. I know this is a little weird but some of the thing he has said have been outrageous! Just now he said

the trombomican banana

I said, whaaa? 

the trombmican banana is a tiger that separates the democrats and republicans. 

then i asked him to repeat himself. He did. and I said to him,

" what does that mean?"

he says, stop making fun of me. we both start laughing.

HAHAHAHA!

p.s here are some recents shots of mine.